Found out I have Aspergers around two months ago, still trying to cope with it today. I’m relatively calmer, now that I know what’s been causing me so much anguish all these years. What was interesting to me were the responses I received when I shared this matter with some of my friends. Some surprised, some skeptical, others felt awkward, some thought nothing of it. A few were particularly funny in the sense that they were denying of what I have been diagnosed with. I guess it doesn’t really matter how they feel about it because now I have something much clearer to me personally, and am trying to work with it. It’s actually a huge fucking relief to know as opposed to figuring out the unknown. 

One down, two to go. Two things that helped my psychologist to identify this neurological difference of mine are my depression and anxiety, both of which mainly stem from the difficulties I’ve been experiencing socially. Of course, there are many other factors as well but by knowing and identifying what I am born with, it’ll be a bit easier to deal with what I’m suffering from now.

An internet friend passed away recently. In reality, we’re not close enough to call each other friends (more like internet acquaintances) but we’ve always had this mutual understanding…or that’s what I’d like to think. But knowing that she committed suicide from depression hits me really hard and it scares me. I have the tendency to have obsessive-compulsive thoughts, mainly about inflicting harm on both others and myself. It’s not happening as frequently as before, but it’s like a long-time devilish friend who drops by from time to time, reminding you of your mortality, your impermanence. Each thought is quite scary but I try to embrace it as another fleeting feeling.

Onto something happier though, despite my struggles with interpersonal issues before, I am now able to talk to people with relative ease. There are times when I still don’t understand how the conversation-game works, but it’s gradually getting better. Twitter helps.

___

It’s Halloween. I should draw something.

Anonymous asked: so, what's your story?

free-spearet:

heartbreakur:

strangeparkings:

Okay, so I normally answer this question with like a 2 minute sentence, but I feel you guys deserve a definitive answer so here we go.

Nicole and I met in 2011, how you may ask, where we met right here. Yup, right here on the same blue dashboard you’re likely reading this post on. We started talking and getting to know each other pretty well, so we moved over to facebook were our friendship escalated into something more.

Soon enough into our long distance relationship we started video chatting:

This went on for about 11 months until we would finally be able to be together.

This is me in an airport on my way to her for the first time:

It was probably the most terrifying moment of my life, personally, and I was incredibly nervous. 

This is us on the car ride back to her house:

She was really shy about being in pictures, so naturally I tried to take 300. 

Eventually she started giving in and took more pictures.

It was only a week, but it was the best week of my life.

Eventually we decided to start living together, I lived with her and her mom while I found a job in Michigan and made enough to get our own place.

Job hunting was fun

Not everything works out as planned though, and we ended up on the streets for 2 months trying to figure out what to do with our lives.

Looking pretty good for a homeless couple right?

When we realized things weren’t gonna work out in Michigan we decided to move to Florida with my family where things would be easier for us. 

I found a job right away.

And eventually Nicole even joined the crew.

Things were going really well for us, so we decided to save every penny we had and give it a go in Michigan again. We found a place that we liked and we were happily awaiting to move in in 2 months.

Things took somewhat of a dramatic turn when Nicoles depression (which she had been battling for a major part of her life) kicked in and she made an attempt at taking her own life.

Unfortunately her family thought I was to blame for it, and since we were still living under their house while the place we wanted was available  I had to go back to Florida to live with my family. We were separated for the first time in over a year.

BUT EVERYTHING CHANGED WHEN WE FOUND OUT NICOLE WAS PREGNANT

She dropped her life in Michigan and flew back to me ASAP

Our youtube channel and our blog had started to pick up a decent amount of followers, so when we asked for your help and put up a wishlist for Charlie things you guys did not disappoint.

Soon enough Nicoles belly started growing

Things had finally settled down, and we were able to enjoy ourselves for the first time, here’s the last Christmas we spent as a party of 2

Before we knew it February had rolled by and it was time for the baby.

And just like that we had conceived and brought a new life into this world.

As of May 2nd 2014 it’s been 3 months since Charlie was born.

She’s absolutely beautiful, and she’s become the center of our world. It’s been a long, hard, and sometimes stressful journey. It isn’t the most polished, or magical, or glamorous love story you will ever hear. But it is our love story, it is our journey, and we are grateful for every step of it we’ve been able to take side by side.

If you’re still following our blog after this huge post with our faces on it thank you so much, you’re awesome! <3

i”m so glad I follow them, they are my faves and I love their story. <3

Crying

it’s a little sad, especially when you’re in a group of people with whom you’re close with and you feel that you can tell them anything but at the same time, you can’t seem to catch up with any of their conversations…idk…

It’s a weird feeling, that moment when you feel like you’re the odd one out. Haven’t felt that way for awhile now. I guess I’m just tired.